There are days, weeks, and even months when it feels like nothing is going right. Any momentum we felt we were making yesterday comes to a screeching halt today.
It’s not fair. It’s not fun. It’s frustrating. It’s discouraging.
But seasons like this happen whether we want it to or not. Sometimes you just have to ride through it and wait out the storm.
It seems to always happen when:
- Your making great strides in a new decision
- You are excited about a new project
- Your biggest client needs something
- You DO NOT have the time
- Your day is already not going well
- You have a to-do list a mile long
You feel discouraged, that nothing is or ever will go right again. Your confidence takes a beating and the light at the end of the tunnel looks like it’s shrinking.
We’ve all been there and most likely will be there again. The client project goes south, the kids know exactly what buttons to push, the car and computer both go kaput on the same day.
At this point you just want to scream. Well you know what? Go ahead. Let out the frustration.
You might want to go somewhere others can’t year you. You might need a windy beach, a sound proof room or a big thick pillow to scream into, but go for it. Letting out that frustration with a primal scream can be therapeutic.
Have a pity party – just make sure to give yourself a time limit. Have a good cry. Let. It. Out.
But then it’s time to pick yourself up and move forward.
This part is incredibly hard and many times you can’t do it alone, you need help, and that is okay!
Making the decision to continue moving forward can become a daily, sometimes hourly decision.
Personally I enjoy wallowing and would much prefer that my friends and family tell me it’s okay. That I’m not an idiot. And most importantly that it’s perfectly fine to sit in my PJs all day and avoid the world and all my problems. Seriously, please feel free to tell me that…
But I know myself, I will be obsessing over what I did wrong, how to fix it, how to avoid it in the future, what I SHOULD have said, what I SHOULD have done instead. So the day in my PJs won’t be relaxing and all that helpful in the end. Sooooo….
What can you do instead?
Go find the small wins
This one is hard. Your task list feels never-ending and you just want to get through it.
But, you do need to take a break from that list or the big issue you are working your way through and walk away for a few minutes.
Find something small that you can do that you will feel good about. It could be straightening your desk, doing the dishes, updating your social media profiles, write your 500 words, write that letter you have wanting to write.
I bet you will feel better for a few minutes at least. Build on that.
Author David Allen Says, “Small things, done consistently, creates major impact”.
That major impact can be on your confidence, your health, your business, your relationships, your projects, your goals… well pretty much anything.
Get Encouragement & Support
Surround yourself with people who will encourage you to keep moving forward even when it is hard. I told a friend last night the being an entrepreneur is not for the faint of heart. To be honest there are days when it just awful and we wonder what in the world are we doing?
We are not meant to be on this journey of life and business alone. We need to find sojourners who are traveling a similar path and understand what we are going through.
Author Barbara Winter says that “Isolation is the dream killer”. Boy is it ever, especially when the road gets rough and you feel like you are lost.
Hearing from other entrepreneurs about what they have experienced can be a big help. When you hear stories of what they have gone through, how they solved a problem or how they kept moving forward helps you realize that you are not alone, this is a part of being a business owner and that there is nothing wrong with you. That you will be okay.
Opening up your heart to God pouring out what is troubling and hurting you should not be a last resort, it needs to be a first resort. But, usually we try to fix it ourselves first don’t we?
Talking to him and letting out how we are feeling is an amazing opportunity we have been given. Through his love and grace he can take that hurt, frustration, loneliness and shriveled up self-confidence and transform it into something beautiful, like a peace beyond understanding.
I just read a great quote from Ann Voskamp, “God’s constant vision is your constant provision”. That is an amazing idea and concept. He knows what we need before we even say it. But he does want us to say it and take time to speak to him one-on-one.
Stop Holding Yourself Back
Consider this quote by Denis Waitley, “It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not”.
When our confidence is shot the perception we have of ourselves changes. We have self-doubt, we have fear, and we have a strong desire to run and hide. As a result, we end up being our own roadblock to moving forward.
Finding a small win, something you know you can do will help re-build your confidence and get you back on track. A series of small wins will help you regain momentum and start seeing the light at the end of the tunnel grow larger again.
So, what can you do today to find 1 small win?
What can you do to encourage a friend to keep moving forward?
Marta Goertzen is an entrepreneur, writer and nature photographer. She daily explores the trails and beaches of the South Central Oregon Coast with her buddy Bailey. You can follow along on their adventures on Instagram. She is also the author of several books including her newest, “Choosing Gratitude: A Daily Quiet Time Journal”.